Monday, October 17, 2016

Be Happy!


I have always prayed, begged, asked the Lord to grant you a life of happiness, peace, success, and that he will give you everything your heart desires. It is still my prayer. After all these years, after all these pains, it is still my prayer. I believe that you deserve that and I believe God will grant my prayers. Be happy now. Stop letting the enemy pull you back from which part of your journey you've reached already. All the enemy wants is for those who choose the Lord to choose otherwise. Because he wants all of us to be miserable. Will you keep allowing him to make you miserable? And make others around you miserable? It would be such a sad life if that would be so. You don't deserve a sad, lonely life, do you? 

Are you truly happy?


Tuesday, September 20, 2016


Bitter or better


"People, they tend to judge you based on what they know about your past." Recently heard this from someone and it resonated with me right away. Most of the difficulties I've been facing lately are born out of the fact that I have been judged. I made choices in my life, and some these are not really nice choices at least as far as other's principles and beliefs are concerned. Well, the choices I made are mine. I always make a conscious effort not to drag others into my misery. I try as much as I can to take it all in bearing in mind that others have got nothing to do with the consequences of what I do. Bearing in mind most of all that these pains will eventually make be stronger and better and will allow me to be there for others, too, who are broken like me. Who is not broken anyway? Even the ones who had a sheltered childhood, they have in one way or another, some kind of brokenness. My past will not define my future. I am nearing the point of my journey where I can stand tall and proud. I can't wait to say, "I made it." 


Wednesday, August 17, 2016

I am a writer, and I can pin you down with my poetry

I am a writer, you are not. You do not have the eloquence of words, they can only stream from a soul that knows a lot about darkness. All you know is how to bask in the sunlight because in there you feel alive. You're scared of the dark. It reflects your emptiness. You do not have the eloquence of words because your brain is a pack of empty cells that know nothing but to blink here and there, every once in a while. You think you're cool, you think you're awesome, you think you're better than the others because you can "speak your mind" out. Really? What does your mind speak about anyway? Trash, trash, nothing but trash. Because first of all, you don't know yourself. You're forever lost. Your identity depends on who accepts you, for the moment. Because people in your life do not stay. Who can stay with an arrogant, all knowing, lost soul?

You see, this is how a writer fights with someone like you. I have plenty of words that hide behind the well laid out poetry of thoughts and emotions that run around like wild rats in a falling off ceiling. These words are well reserved for you. Go on and feign affection. Go on and fake your smile. Go on and pretend there is happiness in your so-called universe. It will not stay long. It will not be there forever. Because the happiness that you call is a smoke from a burnt pile of dead dreams. No, my dear, they're not star dust.

Different roles, different goals

womanI can't remember the last time I felt whole as a woman. Too many different roles I play everyday somehow affects my capacity to love and take care of myself. The battles I have been fighting -- they seem endless -- took so much of my time. What are these battles anyway? Why do they require so much of me? There are times when they overwhelm me I just find myself breaking down, lost, confused and ever so discouraged. Different roles, different battles, different goals. Why can't life be simple? I am a simple person with very simple needs. I am not hard to please. I cry at a sign of a mother bird crying looking for her lost hatchling. Yet I know all these questionings will never end, as long as I live there are always things to wonder about. I just need to step back every once in a while and look at myself, where I am in the midst of all this. I am my own woman, battles and scars, roles  and goals. Nobody can take away my gifts.  Nobody can cause me to stop giving, to stop being gentle, being kind, nobody can stop be from being beautiful as I am. 

Thursday, May 19, 2016

New Beginnings

Indeed He is a God of new beginnings. I started Kwaderno with a clear motivation to help children in need. I invited someone to work with me in the project and it turned out that she got her own "vision" fort the organization. I must say my own values and principles didn't go well with hers. Malice crept in, lies, made up stories. I kept silent all this time keeping in mind that the Lord sees everything.  But God's vindication came right on time. Who can argue with that.  Now Kwaderno is back in my arms, as it is rightfully mine. But I have to keep in my treasure box, everything about it, photos, receipts, certificates, trophies ... oh yes. Trophies. I know they worked hard for it. But nothing we can do. It's not me who wanted them returned :) 

God's ways are indeed mysterious. Kwaderno had to happen to pave the way for Ambit. And yes, that's where I am heading now. 

I praise and thank the Lord for making us worthy of this Ambit experience, an experience of his love, provision, protection, peace, power and mercy. Last May 13-15 was a great affirmation for me.  It was a joy to behold all the volunteers working with passion and love. I didn't experience this in my previous organization. There was a wedge. Something that you can almost feel blocking us so there was no harmony, there was tension looming. With Ambit there is purity in spirit. Everyone was all smiles, just simply happy to be of service. Salamat sa tanan nga volunteers, donors, all who took part to make this project become a reality. May the Lord take care of all your needs and keep you in his love always. From this month onward, Ambit will take on this road to the people and as a channel of all the blessing God will send them, Ambit is ever more ready!











Wednesday, May 18, 2016

More bread pls :)

Looks nice and interesting. I am particularly hyped up to try this because there's a potato in the recipe.

Filipino Bread Rolls

They say one of the secrets to successful business is when you know it by heart. I guess I will have to learn basic baking as soon as possible :)

Endless Possibilities

Journey to forever starts now ... life in the farm is the life for me and I can't wait to start it.